True Friendships

So these past couple of days I have felt extremely convicted in my attitude and how I treat my friends and those relationships. I think recently I have been so confused about what true biblical friendship looked like and how to "spur one another on toward love and good deeds." [Hebrews 10:24].

I was reading a book that we are doing in our bible study and it talked about what biblical friendship looks like. This is what I learned.

1. Christian fellowship has God's glory as its goal.

      A lot of time I feel like I haven't been having God's glory as my goal in my friendships. My goal was to figure out how this person could make me feel better when I am down, or how they could help me. Sometimes this could be my goal in the moment but a lot of times I feel like I have been very selfish in my friendships. 

2. Biblical Fellowship is about discussing and sharing what God is teaching and doing in us. 

      I think that this something that I actually can do. I love to ask my friends what God is doing in their lives. Its so exciting to hear when God is moving and doing in other peoples lives, especially those closest to me. I think it was just a good reminder of what our conversations should be centered on; how we see God moving around us. 

3. My girl friends are one of the most important things

      Don't get me wrong. I am friends with a lot of guys but hanging with the girls is something that I sometimes feel like I can neglect. Guys will give me attention just because I am a girl or I can resort to flirting and joking. With the girls I have to be more real and open and honest with them. They hold me accountable, and encourage me in ways that my other friends can't. These are the friends that will last and grow forever. Even though they are sometimes harder and I have to work to keep them, they are where I can truly be comfortable and be myself.  

4. True friendship is in serving.

       I think one of the things I need to work on is thinking of how I can be a better friend for my friends. Sometimes I get really lazy and don't want to try to keep my friendships up. We are supposed to encourage one another and even when it is hard to keep at it. 

5. Grace

    I think that a lot of times I am harder on my Christian friends than I am on my non-Christian friends. With non-Christians I can't hold them to certain standards because they don't have the Spirit in them to guide them towards these and to convict them. But with my Christian friends, I set a higher standard and sometimes can come off as "high and mighty" which is normally not my intention at all. I think I need to learn how to have a little more grace with those that I love. Not saying that I should challenge them in their lives but to do it in a way that is glorifying to the Lord. My main goal should be to be humble around my friends but still communicate, encourage, and contribute to my friend's growth. 

In general I just think that intentionality in my friendships is something that I am going to have to make a priority. Because as Rob and I were talking about a couple of weeks ago, I can't let the urgent overcome the important. And my friendships are important.